Welcome to Positive Psychology in Crisis, Navigating S*!% Storms! This web-series will look at how to implement the fundamentals of Positive Psychology to help navigate life’s many crises, from a global pandemic to the daily micro-catastrophes that can seem like a nuclear meltdown.

What is Positive Psychology?

Positive Psychology is a shift in psychology from disordered, abnormal, and ill, to a focus of strengths, capabilities, and empowerment. It encourages people to be the best version’s of themselves by using naturalistic, self-focused, side-effect free, zero-cost techniques to thrive in life. Positive Psychology emphasizes choosing the best perspectives, mind-sets, and activities to grow, regardless of the circumstances.

Relying on scientifically proven methods of improving mental wellness, regardless of current mental health, Positive Psychology is accessible to all people, risk free, and adaptable. Using gratitude, kindness, human connection, mindfulness, and more to provide growth, reduction in mental illness, and increase joy. Positive Psychology can be a choose-your-own-adventure of self-improvement, no matter your current mental health.

During times of crisis, like a global pandemic, these techniques and tools are essential. Many of these techniques can be done without leaving your home, let alone couch. We often forget that we always have choices in our perspectives, and default to negative or catastrophic. It is far easier to unknowingly fall into the negative pit than to climb the positive peak, positive is a choice, not an accident.

Reflection Questions

• What is one perspective you want to change in your life? (Being more confident, positive, present, willing, passionate, loving, gentle, grateful, kind etc.)
• How/When/Where/How can you do this?

Boundaries, Setting Yourself Up For Success

We often think of boundaries as things that need to be pushed. When skiing, adventuring, in relationships, or substance consumption it seems that we as humans love to push our limits. We strive to know what we can endure. Sometimes gentle and safe pushing is awesome and lets us grow and thrive. However unsafe boundary pushing allows us to accept small amounts of toxins at first, while slowly building a tolerance and unhealthy threshold of what is acceptable behavior. While extreme boundary pushing can lead to shutdown.

Boundaries are self-imposed, self-enforced rules for what is acceptable in our lives and what is not. Holding firm boundaries will set you up for success in life. Too rigid of boundaries may make it difficult to adapt and grow, those fearful of such violations limits your ability to venture out of your comfort zone. Creating healthy boundaries with others, yourself, and outside influences is essential in crisis as many people have significantly wavered on what is acceptable.

Reflection Question

• What is one boundary you need to set? (Only eat desert at one meal a day, no negative self-talk, exercise 5 days a week, not allowing people to yell at you, two drinks a week, wake up by 8:30, no TV before 5pm, etc.)

Using Gratitude in Crisis

Gratitude is a fundamental principle of Positive Psychology. Gratitude is always accessible and should be practiced often. Gratitude is recognizing, appreciating, or celebrating something or someone of value. It goes beyond automatically politely, yet often disingenuously, saying, “Thank you.” It is deeper, intentional, and genuine.

Scientifically proven to reduce stress, anxiety, depression, and overall grumpiness (maybe even reduce R.B.F.), gratitude is always accessible, free, and shows immediate benefits. Gratitude allows us to focus on what we have, and not what are lacking or missing.

Opportunities to Practice Gratitude

There are many ways to practice gratitude. Try a few out and see what works for you. This does not need to be a big production and can be done silently in any setting.

• Keep a gratitude journal (3 gratitudes/day, 3 gratitudes/week, etc.)
• List what you are grateful for silently (especially when frustrated, angry, or inconvenienced, or at a grocery store)
• Write a letter of gratitude
• Reach out to people or organizations you are grateful for
• Slow down! Take your time and realize all that you have

Reflection Questions

• What is one way you are going to practice gratitude?
• Who is one person you are grateful for? Let him or her know

Kindness and Crisis

During the Pandemic it seems people are being exceptionally kind and caring to others, OR complete selfish-toilet-paper-hoarding jerk-heads. And many of us are probably a blend of both depending on the moment. During this time of crisis we seem to think very selfishly, with an essential self-preservation-survival-of-the-unknown mindset. In reality, kindness should be relied on, a mutually beneficial way of treating one another to grow, even while distant.

Another way that kindness has likely been lacking is self-kindness. Self-care is not selfish and will allow you to thrive AND serve those in your life better. Right now, self-care is essential and can be the difference between survival and significant struggle. Be kind and forgiving to yourself, times are crazy right now, it is normal to be stressed, angry, slightly depressed, frustrated, anxious, or whatever. Be kind to yourself in any way you can.

Kindness is always available and can take on many forms, internally, externally, silently or publicly. Kindness is any act aimed at improving someone’s (or thing’s) experience. Kindness is an intentional choice to improve the way someone feels, operates, or exists.

Opportunities to Practice Kindness

Kindness opportunities often present themselves spontaneously, yet some are always present. Here are a few suggestions for internal and external kindness. Remember, there is no act of kindness too small to make a difference.

• Be intentional with your kindness. Roommates, significant others, friends, people in the market, etc. all can benefit from your kindness. Clean the kitchen, make some shareable cookies, be a good listener, etc. Be intentional and choose kindness.
• Pick up a healthy hobby or project. Think back to when you were a child, what did you enjoy? It doesn’t matter if you are talented or not, just find that joy.
• Treat Yo Self! Do something fun for yourself, splurge (responsibly and safely of course). Be bold and buy something you wanted, or treat yourself to a nice bath. meal, or other guilty pleasure.
• Practice Forgiveness. Forgive your friends for talking about Co-Vid 19 constantly, or yourself for being lazy and unmotivated, or the person acting irrational, or the person who accidentally cut you off in traffic. “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.”~Buddha
• Be kind to nature. Pick up litter, help the mother thrive and grow, she needs our help!
• Volunteer. There are opportunities to serve your community even with social distancing. Give back in some way!
• Don’t be a jerk. It sounds so simple. But if everyone were to just stop being a jerk the world would be amazing!
• The Rage Phishenstein Kindness Opportunity. An offering from one of the kindest people in the universe. Check it out and share!

Savoring the Suck (and little joys) in Crisis

Ok, pandemics, yeah, well, they, uh, suck. A lot. Right now it seems like we are all struggling and lacking. Let’s not pretend like this isn’t massively impactful, it is and will be. However, this doesn’t mean we lose all joy. There are still so many valued things to enjoy and embrace.

Savoring is intentionally, deeply, and intensely experiencing something, usually enjoyable. This is done for a few reasons. First, to savor is to enhance and maximize a positive experience. Second, to store this experience in memory to access at a later, time perhaps when struggling or needing positive. Savoring is free, but offers a deeper appreciation of what is often overlooked or forgotten. There is no reason to let the little (or large) joys in life go unrecognized, under-valued, and experienced partially.

Tips to Savor

• Intentionally engage in the experience. Choose to enjoy it deeper.
• Find specific details. No aspect, observation, or feeling is too small to enhance the experience.
• Use all of your senses. Go through each sense individually and experience it. Taste, scent, sound, sight, and feeling accompany all positive experience, seek them.
• Now, go beyond your senses. Memories, spirits, souls, energy, and feelings all go beyond the limitations and shortcomings of senses.
• Be present in the moment, but think about memories invoked.
• Who would you like to share this experience with? 
• Be mindful. Be intentionally aware of the experience. Be mindful of breathing and self while experiencing and recalling.
• SLOW DOWN!!!!!!!!!

Opportunity to Practice Savoring

• What is something you are going to savor in the next few days? Food, a moment, song, sensation, nature, views, bath, kiss, petting your dog, really anything positive and safely accessible.
• Write down the experience in detail.
• Who would you want to share this with? (Safely reach out and share if possible)

Connecting with your Tribe in Crisis

Even with a plethora of technologies to help us connect, isolation is bountiful in crisis. While connecting virtually with 2-Dimensional versions of our friends and family is amazing, it still isn’t going to completely fill the void of direct, 3-Dimensional hugs and love. We should focus on gratitude for the people that we are able to connect with (Live with or safely see often), and continue to forge virtual connections.

It may not be the same as actually being together, but it is something. If we focus on what we can do, and not what is lacking it can help minimize isolation. Virtually growing together and connecting emotionally, since the physical is difficult, impossible, or dangerous is what we have right now. Reaching out and connecting with valued people in your life is mutually beneficial and can offer the support so many of us need right now.

Tips for Connecting in Crisis

• Reach out. Don’t wait for others to reach out to you, make the first move! Emails, texts, video-chats, phone calls, little notes, a billion social media options. Just reach out in some way. It can be light-hearted.
• Try to do some of the things you always did before the pandemic. Listen to a concert together, make a meal, play a game, all can be done with some modifications virtually.
• Respect other people’s boundaries. Once we start being more physically near each other, respect the space that we all need to feel safe and respectful.
• Be forgiving. Forgive everyone for being a bit crazy, irrational, grumpy, negative, whatever. This includes forgiving yourself for not being at your best as well.
• Express gratitude! Just be grateful you have one another!

Reflection Questions:

• Who is someone you want to connect with? Why?
• What is stopping you from reaching out?

Positive Psychology is not about ignoring or denying the negative in your life. Burying your head in the sand does not make problems diminish, often they intensify. Positive Psychology is about actively, intentionally, and healthily navigating life and being more resilient. You may not control the crisis, but you control your mind-set, decisions, and attitude. So why not choose the positive?!